Back to school soon!

Many months ago, towards the end of my second teaching practice, I vowed to get my paperwork in order during the summer holidays. My study (which I’m so glad I have!) resembled a bombsite – it got the the point where I had to relocate to the dining room because I couldn’t even see my desk! Gone were the days of inviting people over – the dining table housed my laptop and printer and was strewn with lesson plans. But the first two weeks of the holidays were spent religiously tidying and sorting. All the paperwork I doubted I’ll need was thrown into a big box marked “PGCE stuff” and was (loving) placed in the attic, all my paper resources were filed by both subject (i.e. Biology, Chemistry and Physics) and Key Stage and my laptop and printer finally moved back home. I had indeed forgotten my study has a desk in it!

Now that I have well and truly finished my teacher training, I can safely say it was the toughest year of my life so far. I thought my Master’s was difficult – it didn’t compare to a PGCE! I honestly didn’t find the assignments the difficult part, nor the fact I didn’t see friends during the week. The way I thought about it was that I didn’t go out after school when I was a pupil, so it wasn’t much different – socialising was left until the weekend. Planning lessons was a chore but it wasn’t too painful. What made my PGCE difficult was the relentless bullying I faced at School 2. In hindsight, I honestly think that’s what it was. I think they didn’t like the fact that I was going to leave. I was the only person under 40 in the department as well, which didn’t help me. But what got to me was the constant “We don’t agree with the PGCE – the only way to train is training on the job” attitude. I mean, why sign up to be a link school if you don’t agree with the programme? When I started at School 1 my managing mentor said to all the PGCE students: “The departments you’re in really want you – we haven’t just done this for the money because we don’t actually get that much!” I didn’t realise the significance of her words until I started at School 2.

But things have brightened up since I started at Penguin High. The department’s younger, more relaxed and open to new ideas. Its science specialism is great as well because it makes you feel important. And Science departments should feel important! I really feel like I’m part of something great there and I’m so glad to be part of the team. I know my NQT year will be tough and I’ll face even more challenges (although I think the jury’s out as to whether the NQT year is tougher than the PGCE year) but I’m ready for it – bring it on!

P.S. I’d also like to take this opportunity to thank my ever-supportive parents, family and boyfriend for the love and advice over the last year – I simply couldn’t have done it without them. Back in 2007 when I was applying for the PGCE, a friend who had just started it told my boyfriend he’d only see me at weekends. I felt bad about this but he said he didn’t mind as he was so proud of me for following my dream. That’s the kind of guy he is.

The light at the end of the tunnel… is the oncoming train!

So that’s it, the end of my PGCE. I can’t quite believe it’s all over. And, as much as I have hated the last nine months, I loved it too. Yes, it’s been tough – but hopefully it’s been worth the pain. I left with a tear in my eye this afternoon: it seems bizarre that I’ll never see my tutors again as they’ve been my lifeline over the course – I regard them a lot like how I regarded my teachers in Sixth Form. But funnily enough, I’m not sure if I’ve made any friends. Yes, it’s been nice seeing people on the course when we’ve been at university so that we can have a moan about things, but I doubt I’ve made any lifelong friendships. Still, we all survived!

Tomorrow I am going to the Association of Science Education (ASE) South East Area Science & CPD Conference being held at the University of Surrey in Guildford. I figured that it was only £30 (because I’m a student) and I have the day off, so I might as well. I’m attending all sorts of sessions on things that I’m interested in, rather than things I should be interested in, so hopefully I’ll enjoy it!

And next weeks starts the biggest change in my life – full time work. I start at Penguin High as an NQT on Monday and I can’t quite believe I’ve been given my wings and been forced to fly! Part of my thinks that I’ve been pushed before I’m ready but I know it’s just nerves. As we were told today: this is the end of the beginning, not the beginning of the end. This is just the end of my training. And now I’m about to start the real thing.

They think it’s all over… it is now!

Firstly I must apologise for not making a new post for what seems like an eternity! I’ve been very busy at university and I’ve actually seen my friends recently!

Finishing at School 2 was a rather joyful occasion. I was so excited on my last day! They didn’t seem to fussed that I was leaving – even my mentor didn’t realise it was my last day. But I went out and celebrated with my non-teacher friends in the evening. I really feel I owe so much to them. They’ve put up with not seeing me for ages and have been very supportive through Facebook. And I’ve always known I can call them for a chat or a cry! Crying is something I did a lot at School 2. Whether it was because of the pupils or the teachers I’m not sure.

We’ve done a lot of work on Learning Outside the Classroom at university recently. This could be because it’s a key research area for some of our tutors! But it also provided a bit of relaxation time for us trainees. I say relaxation, but it’s been mighty stressful – I didn’t realise how draining it is to not only plan activities but also to supervise pupils for five hours straight. We were asked at the end of each day how we felt – “shattered” was the general concensus! During teaching practice we felt emotional drained – this was physically draining.

We spent three days at Royal Botanical Gardens, Kew and three days at the Natural History Museum. One day was for orientation/familiarisation, one day was for planning and the final day was with pupils. The pupils we had at Kew were ones we’d never met before and the ones at Natural History Museum were ones from School 1 – it was lovely to see them and David! It reminded me of how good I had it before, before I became cynical and lost all confidence in myself. I’ve always doubted the educational value of school trips – when I was at school, I just liked the shop! But now I’ve realised that the “educational value” only applies when you’re applying for permission or funding – it really is important that pupils see you outside the classroom and that they can have fun once in a while!

I must admit that I think I enjoyed Kew much more than the pupils did! The last time I went to Kew Gardens was when I was in Year 7 – nearly eleven years ago! And I thought it was boring – plants were boring. To me, plants were green, some had flowers. Only by studying some plants at Kew in depth have I realised just how incredible some of them are – how they’ve adapted to their different enviroments is amazing. And some are just beautiful. I hope I never revert back to thinking: “Plants are green, some have flowers.” I hope I always see them for the awesome things they are.

I start at Penguin High in a few weeks’ time and I’m really nervous. I’m just worried that School 2 anihilated my teaching ability and I’m going to sink. I’m also worried that I’ll get a reputation as a bad teacher before I “really” start in September. I suppose the key is to be harsh now and ease off later if necessary.

So although on paper I haven’t finished my teacher training, the hard work is over. I can’t believe I survived. The last four months have been the hardest of my life, much harder than when I was doing my Master’s! One of my friends is thinking about doing teacher training and I don’t want him too because I love him too much and don’t want him to go through the hell I’ve been through. And I’ve heard that the NWT year is harder. Wish me luck!

Let it snow

So, I have been snowed in to my suburban London home and though it would be an opportune moment to blog about my teaching career thus far.

I love it, plain and simple. If you know me at all, I love filling in forms and pretening I’m organised. (I know, I’m weird.) That’s why teaching’s the perfect profession for me – I love paperwork. It’s got nothing to do with educating people! Seriously though, I love that moment when a penny drops for a pupil or you manage to convince a totally disinterested pupil that science can be fun. Or someone who has no faith in themselves realises, with some help, that they can actually do science. I love giving pupils that little push to help them believe in themselves and to develop the confidence to admit they don’t understand some things – too many people are too scared to admit they don’t know everything.

I love teaching, I love working in schools – I just hate doing my PGCE! Sessions at university are so dull and lectures are so irrelevant. I wish I could be back in school. Even School 2, with the delight that is Bob, my new mentor.

Thank you and goodbye, School 1

So that was that. My final day at School 1. I had a meeting with David the day before (my usual weekly meeting) and we decided that it’d be better for me to let a cover teacher take my last lesson with Year 9 as their normal teacher wasn’t in and, for health and safety reasons, trainees can’t do practicals without a science teacher present. To cut a long story short, I didn’t have to teach on my last day. Which made it quite fun! I had tutor time with my delightful Year 8 form. And I mean delightful – I loved them! I took them chocolates and they’d organised a party and all signed a card! I felt so loved, I really did. I had to try so hard not to cry. All us trainees went to Nando’s for lunch as well, which was very yummy!

I decided I wasn’t going to piss about in the staff room like I usually do when I’m free in the afternoons. (If David or anyone else asks, I was busy planning lessons!) Instead I went an had a natter with Susan. Eventually the end of the school day came and everyone was telling me to get down to the pub. But I didn’t want to. I was scared. I was scared because I knew that, unless the headteacher was lovely and created a vacancy for me, that’d be the last time I’d be in School 1. I was trying to delay leaving. It really felt like home. And they’d all signed a card for me too. I know they’d've done it for anyone who left, but it felt really special. So, having read my card and everything, I finally was being dragged to the pub. Susan wasn’t able to join us and I cried so much when I had to say bye to her. (My eyes are still filling with tears as I type this.) She is truly one of the most wonderful people I have ever met, she really is. Everyone took the mick out of me for crying but I didn’t care.

I loved School 1 so much. I know there’s behaviour issues and they school’s not that academic, but for the most past the kids are lovely and the staff are amazing. If they’d have me, I’d be there in a heartbeat.

And now the end is near…

… And so I face the final curtain.

As my time at my first placement school comes to a close, I am actually typing this with a tear in my eye. But, surprisingly, just the one. For I have come to realise that that’s life – you have to move on. It’s only a placement and I was only ever meant to be there for twelve weeks: it’s not like I’ve worked there for years and have had to come through really tough times. (Maybe I’ve spoken to soon – there are a few dsays to go!) But, having worked at School 1 for the grand total of  54 days, I’ve built relationships with my colleagues and peers and I’ve finally developed a rapport with some of my classes. In the last three or four months, I’ve spent more time with my colleagues than my boyfriend, which is weird if you think about it! And I’ve only really seen my friends on about three separate occasions. So I guess that’s why I’ll miss School 1. I don’t think I’m dreading it too much as I’m secretly hoping I’ll get a job there for July! Just think, I’ll have initials on the school timetable!

I’ll stop being silly now. Well, too silly. I haven’t found it half as stressful as I thought I would at School 1. Having said that, my paperwork and teaching files are practically non-existent – maybe I;d be more stressed if I’d been doing all the paperwork properly! Granted, there’s been tough moments, and I’ll freely admit I’ve had moments when I’ve been thinking: “Why on Earth am I doing this?! I DON’T WANT TO BE A TEACHER!!!” But for every one of those moments, I’ve had a thousand good ones. Here’s to all the other trainee teachers out there, especially the scientists at my ITT university. Best of luck for your second placement.

Accidentally referring to School 1 as “home”

So I visited my second placement school (which will hereon be referred to as “School 2″) yesterday as I start there in a few weeks. And it felt weird. I felt like I was betraying School 1. My new managing mentor is lovely, although she doesn’t work on Wednesdays – which would prove to be annoying later in the placement. And my new mentor, Bob, is the polar opposite of David. In fact the entire school is the opposite of School 1. Oh, David and Bob are both the Head of Physics in their respective schools. But that’s where the similarities end. Bob’s never been a mentor, he told me in not so many words that he never wanted to be a mentor because of the extra workload, and he’s a bit, well, meh. (I love the word “meh” – it says so much without saying anything at all!) But what got to me is how insular the staff are. People in the same department barely talk to each other, let alone go to the staff room. On the plus side, there are paper towels in the staff toilets, which School 1 lacks.

So that was that. I went home and cried, and told my mum how I can’t believe I’m leaving home soon. She was shocked until she realised I meant School 1. I do honestly think of School 1 as home now – the staff are so close and supportive of each other. Please don’t make me leave. If you do, I promise I will cry.

Out with the old and in with the new

I’m coming up to the last week at my first placement school and, I’ll be honest with you, I’m dreading it. I’m absolutely s*****g myself. I have a horrible feeling that the staff at this school are exceptionally nice and that most mentors aren’t a tenth of what David is. And I’m guessing the science faculty is more wonderful than most as well. I’m scared.

On Friday I am spending the day at my second placement school. Just the whole admin side of it – sorting out a timetable, getting books and class lists, making endless photocopies of my CRB disclosure. It’s a school that’s very local to me and I know the area well (it was the follow-on school for my primary school, but I didn’t go there). It’s a relatively small school (1200 pupils) in a residential area and scored all 2’s and 3’s in its most recent Ofsted report (as opposed to placement 1’s 3’s and 4’s). Oh, I’ve just looked at the date of the most recent report – March 2006. Which means They’ll be coming while I’m there. Unless it’s in the few weeks before I start…

The end of a very important year

I suppose I’d been looking forward to 2008 for a very, very long time. I know it sounds weird, looking forward to a year, but I had been. And everything happened the way I hoped it would.

Back in 2003, I was a nervous sixth-form student filling out my UCAS form. Trying to decide which courses to apply for, which universities to apply to, whether I wanted to stay in London or to go somewhere further afield. I had a bit of a dilemma because I wanted to study both Chemistry and Physics at degree-level and I didn’t like the sound of Chemical Physics as it didn’t include enough Physics. (It was more the physics of chemistry, not Physics itself.) Not only did I love both Chemistry and Physics and was determined to not give up studying either, I thought it would help me with my future teaching career to be equally qualified in two branches of science – quite a bit of forward-planning for a 17-year-old! Four years on, when I was applying for my PGCE, I didn’t count on my love of both the subjects to stay the same – trying to decide which subject to train in was pretty difficult. In the end I chose Physics because I’d cope better with the maths than I would with organic chemistry!

Having been a very organised 17-year-old (a lot did change – you should see me now!), I knew which path I wanted to follow – an four-year MSci followed by a one-year PGCE. (I didn’t want to do a BEd on the off-chance that, by the end of my degree, I’d changed my mind about going into teaching.) When I was filling out my UCAS form, we had to put the start and end dates of the courses we were applying for. September 2004 seemed like a lifetime away when I was filling out the form in September 2003 – the end date, June 2008, seemed like an eternity. And the idea that I’d finish my PGCE in 2009 seemed a million years away.

So 2008’s been and gone now. I was always nervous about doing a masters as I was never really into independent work. Out of my group of friends at university, I was the one we all though was the most unlikely to finish the course. I’ll be honest with you, it was those friends that got me through it. 2008 made me realise that anything’s possible if you’ve got enough support. I still can’t quite believe I finished my degree! I collected my degree certificate a few weeks ago and it still doesn’t seem real.

But the thing I was looking forward to the most in 2008 was starting my teacher training. And it hasn’t let me down so far. Other than all the lesson planning, evaluations, marking according to National Curriculum levels, the assignments, the sleepless nights and dreams about lesson planning, I wouldn’t change it for the world.

With all best wishes for 2009. Let’s hope it’s a good one!

So this is Christmas…

First off, sorry for not blogging for what seems like a very long time!

The coming of the Christmas holidays has given me some time to think about my first term of teacher training. Yesterday, I saw loads of cousins at the traditional family get-together and, other than one of my cousin’s pregnancy, it was the hottest topic. As I listened to other people, young and old, go on about work and how they were dreading going back after the festive season, I realised one thing – I wouldn’t change this for the world. I absolutely love my teacher training, simple as. Yes, I know I have loads of work to do and I’m three weeks behind with my lesson evaluations. Yes, I know I have loads of assignments to do and yes, I know the kids can be a right pain in the arse, but I love it. Maybe it’s the fact I love my colleagues as well. (I know I’ve been lucky in that respect.) I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else and I’m dreading the fact I have to leave my first placement school in a few weeks.

As my time at my first placement school draws to a close, I’ve been thinking about what makes a good teacher. We were asked to write 1-2 sides of A4 on this before we started the PGCE course and I haven’t read my piece since I wrote it in September. So I’ll give you a brief summary of what I, after one term’s training, thinks makes a good teacher. There’s two versions – the one I’d dare to hand in and the one I wouldn’t.

A good teacher is someone who can survive a disruptive Year 10 class who don’t want to work. A good teacher is someone who soldiers on in spite of the class having no respect for them. A good teacher battles through the specification in time for the January exams just so they can say they’ve finished.

I’ll start again…

A good teacher has a passion for their subject and strives to convince just one pupil that the subject is so interesting that not only did they want to study it at GCSE, they wanted to study it at A-level and then pull it apart to the nitty gritty at university. A good teacher is more than a subject teacher, they are a life teacher. Some teachers forget that not only do they have more experience in the subject than their pupils, but they have more life experience too. Teachers demonstrate the qualities they dream their pupils will have when they become teenagers and young adults – I’m a firm believer that you have to practise what you preach. A good teacher is humble and will be open to learning things from their pupils. No-one knows everything – we can all learn from each other irrespective of age. Many people will say that you are a teacher 24-hours a day. Whilst I can easily believe that is true (yesterday I woke up thinking, “Right, it’s Thursday, what am I teaching Year 7 today?”), I don’t think it’s a good thing. Teachers are human beings and need to have interests outside of teaching – it’s what makes it “life” instead of just an existence. Other than the fact it makes your pupils realise you’re human, outside interests make people more rounded and more focused on what’s important. A good teacher isn’t afraid to admit they’re only human.

Happy Christmas everyone. Here’s to term 2…